-Lance
———————————————————

Hey guys,

Asher here, I’m one of the head coaches here and have been running workshops for over 5 years, and also been talking to clients on the phone *every day* for most of that time. (Well, not the weekends.  Those are for workshops, or if I’m not working, ME.)

One thing I’ve noticed is that guys are all hung up about their body language.  The thing is, they’re right.  You *should* care about your body language.  It makes a HUGE difference in how you’re perceived.  (Not just by girls, by *everybody*).  If you don’t already know this, you’re either new here or haven’t been paying attention.

BUT

(and this is a big BUT)

They’re totally blowing it most of the time.  Every time a guy tells me about his body language, it’s within the context of some interaction with some cute girl that he’s totally interested in.   What’s wrong with this, you ask?  Here’s the thing: If you’re thinking about your body language while interacting with a girl, you’re not paying any attention to HER!

If I need to explain to you why this is bad, we probably need to talk.  (Email me about an evaluation call…)

Hopefully you get it.  This is retardedly bad.  Imagine some guy in a boxing ring thinking, “Ok, keep my guard up.  Throw a jab. Keep my wrist straight. Keep my other hand up.”  He’d be toast.  That stuff needs to be *automatic* for him to have ANY chance at success.

This is the point.  If you want your body language to make a good impression on a cutegirl, it has to happen automatically.  Seriously, auto-pilot needs to be driving your body.  You need to keep your attention free so you can pay attention to HER!

So how do you do this?  Simple. You do it just like the boxer; you train.  Think about it, a boxer is going to learn how to box BEFORE he gets in the ring, so by the time he’s there, he doesn’t have to think about it.

Body language is an easy one to train because of one simple fact: You can do it by yourself.  This isn’t true for flirting or having a conversation.  If you’re doing that by yourself, you’ve got problems.

Here’s the trick.  When you’re at home, alone,  pay attention to your body language.  This is the time that asking yourself questions like, “Am I taking up lots of space? Is my spine straight? Am I relaxed?”  When you get up to grab something from the fridge, walk cool.

This is exactly how the workshops work.  When you’re in the classroom with your coaches, you’re training.  We can give you feedback and make sure you’re doing it right.  THEN we go outside, and not a moment before.  Anything less would be irresponsible.  That’s like sending somebody into the ring with Mike Tyson without making sure they can box first.

-Asher

She was the perfect girl to get this secret from. What are the caliente chicas really after?

“Yeah, not what you are supposed to look for. I mean, really, what gets you a little hot and bothered?”

She looked down at the floor, then back up at me, and smiled.

“You know what I really look for? A normal guy. A normal guy… with nice shoes.”

“That’s it?”

“You have any idea how hard that is to find?” she asked. “If I could just find that, I would be the envy of every girl in the world. Yep. That’s the top of the heap right there.”

Normal guy with nice shoes. Huh. You’d really think it would be more detailed than that, or maybe like the guy would have to have a chiseled six-pack, or drink a certain light beer, or drive the Batmobile.

But normal guy? Nice shoes? That’s it? Anyone can do that, right?

Well, yes and no.

See, when it comes to getting babes, lots of guys think it’s really hard.

The truth is, as men know, that getting girls is either easy, or next-to-impossible.

If you know the things that women look for, it’s easy. But if you don’t, you can work and work and work, but you’ll never get the choice with women you want.

See, girls live in a different world than we do. It’s nice there… it looks pretty, and smells like flowers and bath salts.

Among these finer things that make up the world of a hotie, fashion is at the top of the list.

Women use fashion to establish and maintain the social order. And the more status a woman has, the more critical the correct fashion is.

A hotie needs a guy who looks right. When she looks at you, she immediately knows how she will feel going places with you and showing you off to her friends.

If you don’t look like you can dress the way she wants, the way that fits her life, she can’t take a chance on you.

She needs to know that you are the kind of guy who dates girls like her. That’s how she knows you will be appropriate to her. She wants someone who matches. Why?

Because then you will understand her.

Girls do not want to waste time explaining to men what’s important. No one wants a fixer-upper. They want a house that’s already really nice and comfy and clean, and they can move right in and start showing it off to their friends.

Make sense right?

There’s one other little secret about shoes that NO ONE else knows, but I’ll tell you, because, you know, I like you and want you to do well.

She looks to see how clean your shoes are to figure out how clean you are.

Shoes are basically the clothing analog to good grooming. Just like your body, shoes need to be MAINTAINED to look good.

It takes a bit of care and patience to keep good shoes looking great, and that says a lot about how you take care of yourself…

AND… you guessed it.

How well you take care of others in your life as well.

She’s thinking about what it would be like to sleep with you pretty much from the start. But she’s also thinking “will it be fun and crazy and sexy, or will it be gross and slovenly and uncomfortable?”

Guess which one she’s gonna pick if you’re wearing beat-up, smelly old sneakers?

So what to do?

If you don’t know fashion, start asking. You don’t have to be Project Runway-level expert, but you can’t make mistakes.

Every guy makes them. I used to. And that’s why I put out my Dress To Impress Program and actually taped the process of giving 5 guys a fashion make-over.

The Dress For Success Program

I took all my years of experience and put it into this DVD set, so any man could watch and finally understand what his style has been telling women all these years.

If you don’t know what your style says now, you need to figure it out.

After all, K. is still out there looking for that normal guy with sweet zapatos.

And you know the first thing she’s looking at, and it’s not your bank account.

Get your style on and go meet some women!

Your friend,
Lance Mason

P.S. – You, mi amigo, are losing women every single day because of your clothes, your hair, and your look. Your clothes can get you laid, or get in the way. Right now, you are losing girls to guys like me who learned how to dress. Get fixed up NOW with my Dressed
for Success program and never lose out again:

http://www.PickUp101.com/DressForSuccess

P.P.S. – While you’re at it, get a boost of Physical Confidence at:

http://www.PickUp101.com/PhysicalConfidence

AND learn how to approach fearlessly under ANY circumstances:

http://www.PickUp101.com/FearlessFirstImpressions

Both of these products come with a special bonus interview with Brad P. supplies limited.

Time is ticking down to one of the BEST Holidays for meeting women…  Find out the 11 Top Tricks & Treats to make your Halloween a Night to Remember!

You get to see exactly how it’s done, and we’ll perfect your technique as you attract women with your newfound skills. I won’t promise it’s easy, but it is FAST and it GETS RESULTS.

As you make your way around the site, you’ll see why our training programs and products are rapidly becoming known throughout the world for giving ‘average’ guys the charisma, confidence, and sexual magnetism that women instantly respond to.

You’ll learn how to transform yourself into that naturally confident man you always dreamt you would become, not the tricks of a ‘pickup artist’. Because my reputation is on the line on a daily basis to perform and teach these techniques, I make sure nothing gets on this site unless I know it works, and can get results quickly and consistently for anyone.

You’ll find no glossy pictures of paid models, no untested ‘theory’, and no bull – just truckloads of mind blowing information that will change your relationships with beautiful women forever.It’s all here for you and I look forward to serving you.

Your friend,

Lance Mason

P.S. – Are you new to ArtOfAttraction.com? Don’t know where to start? Then click here.

I’ve put together a quick video showing you one of my favorite ways to start conversations with women.

Lance also talks about what he calls the 3 ‘Tipping Points’ of dating…

Unfortunately the audio quality was horrible, so we couldn’t release it as it was.  But you’re in luck; we had a full transcript made:

Here it is in full,

-Andy

P.S. – Let us know what you think in the comments section below!

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Andy: Hello, this is Andy and I work for Lance Mason’s Pickup 101 and The Art of Attraction program. If you’ve ever seen the Fearless First Impressions product or if you’ve ever seen the sales page on that, then you’ve probably read my story. About three years ago I went to this amazing workshop and after seeing Lance do his thing and having gone through the workshop and then going out and doing it myself, I was hooked.

I ended up quitting my job and joined Lance here with the company and have had a great time ever since. I now work in the office and I also work as a field coach, but one of the things that Lance would really like to talk about today and me too, because honestly it’s my favorite way to meet women is during the day time.

So, Lance, I know that you’re here on the line so well let’s start off. What is it that you’d like to talk about with DayGame and building connection with women and just dating in general?

Lance: Well, Andy, I think those are the three just real hot topics that I’m really focused on. You know, we talked a lot about a lot of things since we’ve been working together here now for three years. Thanks for sticking with me all this time.

Andy: Thanks.

Lance: I know it’s been… We’ve been working hard here some weeks. But, we talked about a lot of different skills. We’ve talked about, you know, body language and what to say to women and how to really manage multiple women and all kinds of different topics that we’ve taught.

But, I’m really excited about this combination in particular because I think when you know how to meet women during the day and you know how to build a real intense connection with them even in just 15 minutes or less and you know what to do on the first date, I really think you’ve given a guy the whole package to really get off and running.

And just immediately start getting more choice with women, just right away. And, you know, the other skills, if he has great body language, great. And if he can have long real intriguing conversations with women, great. But even if he doesn’t have those skills he’s still getting dates and he’s still making progress. So, that’s why I’m so excited about this particular combination, why I’ve really been focused on it for years, I think I’ve been focused on these techniques. It’s been real exciting.

Andy: Well, one thing that just kind of intrigued me was when I started working for you the big thing was just going out at night and hitting all the nightclubs, doing the whole thing like that. What happened to going out in bars?

Lance: What happened to going out in bars? It’s still a great thing to do. Bars are a great place to learn certain skills and I love teaching guys in the bars. If you’re talking about learning to make a really smooth approach or learning how to perfect your body language or learning how to open and start conversations with women bars are the best place because you can practice them over and over and over again. You just really repeat the process, so it’s great, it’s great thing learning in bars, and it’s great to practice those skills in bars because, you know, women will tell you if your approach isn’t tight. They’ll tell you if your body language is bad.

Andy: Oh man. You don’t even have to tell us about that!

Lance: So, I mean, it’s great to practice in bars because you really know if you’re nailing it or not. Because here’s the thing, during the day women aren’t going to shoot you down just because you’re not radiating confidence right there. Usually women are just amazed to be approached during the day. You usually don’t get approached during the day.

So, I’m really just trying to say bars are great, you know, especially for guys who love going out to bars, a lot of guys like, I mean I liked going out to bars every night. I mean, I was going out five or six nights a week for years and yes I was doing it to meet women and in fact in the beginning I didn’t really like it. But, in fact, I learned to like it and really enjoy it.

So, if you really enjoy going out to bars don’t stop, but what I found was that for most guys, they’re just really, really busy and you know I’ve taken guys out to bars. Let’s perfect your body language. Let’s perfect your opening. And they’re just like “Lance, I just want to date some women. Can you just, you know, can you just give me some women to date? “

Andy: That’s totally it, because I know when I was first learning this stuff actually there was a point when I was going out five, six nights a week and that was all good and everything, but, you know I was really interested in dating a girl. I really didn’t need to just go out and do the whole club thing. It was fun, but…

Lance: You were really dedicated and I remember you being really dedicated. Most guys just don’t have the time. And they’re just like just give me the women. That’s where I think bars aren’t the ideal. You know I think the core skills that will get guys girls right away, the DayGame, the rapport. Getting that connection with women can be really difficult in bars too. And if you meet women in bars it can be really tough to get them to show up on a date as opposed to if you meet them during the day, so.

You just can’t hit that sweet spot of really the kind of things I’m teaching right now. Obviously we still take guys out to bars. It’s still the best place to work on your approach over and over again, your body language over and over again. Going to the bars is a great thing but I think these three tools alone will get most guys to a point where they’re dating multiple women, they really have a choice of women, and they can decide, you know, how far they want to take it from there.

Andy: Yeah, the way that I really saw going out during the nighttime was strictly as a training tool. It was only to get over your approach anxiety and a lot of guys just need the proof in their own mind that, yes, I can do it. But, like you say, the sweet spot really is during the daytime. But one thing I did want to mention, is you’ve been talking a lot about time management. Now can you please tell a little bit more about what you mean by time management with this?

Lance: Time management, well, you know, we talked a lot about, and it’s just easier to meet women during the day. I mean. I used to block out big chunks of my time, you know, really three hours. I mean, I was probably blocking out 15 hours a week, 20 hours a week, just totally focused on meeting women. And most of our coaches, especially our early coaches did that. And some of our coaches now really didn’t have to go through that phase.

A lot of guys, they just don’t have the time to do that. They just don’t want to do that and you’re just going to have to recognize like, hey just because I learned that way. It took me like ten years to really get to where I want. So, how do I get there without putting in all that work?

You know, another thing too, it’s not really just time management. Time management is what you hear from other guys. They’re like; hey I don’t want to go out at night. I don’t want to be spending hours on this. From their perspective it’s time management, but from my perspective it’s much more than that.

From my perspective it’s I see in students a tipping point because there’s some students who take on this and say I want to get better with women, I want choice of women, come on bring it on Lance. And some guys you see them go through to success and get everything they want and other guys you see them get stuck on a path and they either give up or worse they feel like something’s wrong with them.

You know, because they see other people succeed so they know it’s not the material, so they’re like, oh my god, maybe there’s something wrong with me and I can’t do this, so.

Andy: Yeah, I know exactly what you’re talking about.

Lance: So, what I want to do is I want to get a guy to what I call the ‘tipping point’ as early as possible. A couple of ‘tipping points’, well you know the ‘tipping point’ from the business book by Malcolm Gladwell.

Andy: Yeah.

Lance: There really is a point to where a guy’s learning, he’s struggling, he’s struggling, and there’s times where it tips and it’s not learning anymore, its adventure, its fun. You almost have to tie a guy down to keep him from approaching women. And there’s a couple ‘tipping points’ that I’ve noticed. And my goal really is to get the guys to those ‘tipping points’ as soon as possible, partially for time management, but mostly just out of wanting to make sure they finally make it. Wanting to make sure they’re successful.

So the first ‘tipping point’ is when it becomes fun and it stops being work and becomes fun. I notice that when you take guys out in bars you have to be very careful. And we take out guys; we take out guys in bars in a very controlled environment. We give them exercises for hours. We teach them exactly what to do. We warm them up. We make sure they have a good experience in the bar.

But, if they don’t go through that process and they go out in the bar they can actually have a lot of bad experiences.

Andy: Yes.

Lance: And that sets guys back. It can actually set them back weeks or months because you know you see it in their confidence. Then you almost see guys get less and less confidant and less and less skilled as they talk to women during the night because they haven’t been set up properly.

So, during the day you don’t have that problem near as much. There are less women around, but if you’re just kind of living your life you’re going to find that most women are going to have a conversation with you and you’re going to get excited and you’re not going to get shot down as much. You’re not going to get beat up as much.

So, that first ‘tipping point,’ is meeting women fun, gets addressed pretty quickly.

Andy: Oh, definitely. Yeah, I know exactly what you’re talking about with the… …When you’re out in the nightclub and you’re not completely warmed up or you’re not at that point where you’re just going out to have fun is just what you’re going out to do. And you’ll see guys, like over that evening, you can see them where they’re really reluctant to start off with and they just kind of start off with a regress.

Where when you’re talking about going out during the daytime, you’re just out there, you’re living your life, it’s “Hey! [There's a] Cute girl!” I’m going to have to go talk to her.

Lance: It’s like women are just coming to you in your life. You’re shopping for groceries and you met a cute girl. It’s like how awesome is that. I can go out anywhere. I didn’t have to do anything I didn’t want to do. I’m just there getting a bagel and there’s a woman and I have a couple minute conversation and maybe she has a boyfriend and things don’t go on from there or who knows maybe we get a date. But it’s fun either way. It’s fun either way.

Andy: Oh, definitely.

Lance: So, here’s another ‘tipping point,’ Andy that I want to talk about. And this one’s the next one. And this is the ‘tipping point’ where you just have women in your life. There’s women that you’re dating and these don’t have to be your dream, I mean, these don’t have to be a super model or whatever… Just get women in your life, women pursuing you.

Because, man, I can tell and women can tell just by looking at a man if he has women in his life.

Andy: Definitely.

Lance: You can just tell. They just get this glow, man. I don’t want to get all feminine in terms of language and stuff, but guys just get this glow, this spark about them, when they know they can get laid whenever they want. It’s just so important.

Andy: Oh, it’s a beautiful thing.

Lance: And so attractive to women just seeing that in a guy they go well here’s a guy I can trust. If he wants to be with me he has a choice he must really want something about me. So, women really look for that. So, that’s another ‘tipping point.’ It just has to be getting a couple dates and that’s what I love about this system. It’s so easy to get a couple of dates no matter how busy you are.

I am sick of guys telling me they’re too busy to do what I tell them and that’s why I’m excited about this system, there’s no excuses.

Andy: Oh, definitely, definitely.

Lance: You do have to get a cup of coffee in the morning. You do have to eat lunch.

Andy: You know what my favorite thing about this is Lance? My favorite thing out of everything, it’s not bars, it’s not going to the mall, it’s the subway.

Lance Oh, the subway.

Andy: Oh man…

Lance: I love the gym. The gym is my place. You know, I hear what you’re saying, like everywhere you go there’s just women. And it’s so fun. So, that’s the second ‘tipping point’ is you get women in your life.

And the third ‘tipping point’ and this happens really quickly where you start to notice this, that the women are actually pursuing you. And part of that is a psychological thing, but part of it is just the reality. I mean, there are, there are always women interested in men and the truth is most men can’t even see it.

You know, and you learn this working with the students.

Andy: Yeah.

Lance: Anyone who’s ever coached knows this because you’ll sit down to talk to a woman either in a bar or during the day or whatever event he’s at and he’ll come back and he won’t think he had a good interaction, but we know because we do this stuff in and out, weekend after weekend. We know, like she liked you man. And he can’t see it.

Andy: yeah, you know, another thing that I learned while going through this whole process, I suppose, when you walk into a room just paying that much more attention to noticing the girls that already want you.

Lance: Yeah, totally. I mean most guys just don’t see it and then you start to get a little bit of a head trip about it where you just walk around assuming that every woman wants you.

Andy: Well, they do!

Lance: They do, exactly. And it actually works. It’s a total self fulfilling prophecy and those are the guys that you don’t ever need to teach them anything ever again.

Andy: Right.

Lance: And you’ve watched a lot of guys go through that process. Sometimes even on the weekend guys will go through that process. But those are the ‘tipping points’ and when I just look at those ‘tipping points’ you kind of realize, you know what, bar stuff, that’s cool all right, we definitely can teach you guys a lot in a bar, but it’s not going to get them to those ‘tipping points.’

The quickest way possible and especially from the low risk way possible and then I want to just get back to the time management stuff too because I haven’t talked about the coolest stuff of this whole combination which is really that you don’t, you literally spend zero time hunting women.

Andy: Right, right.

Lance: You spend a little time talking to women. There’s time dating women and you might even have to mark off time in your calendar to actually sleep with women. So, there is time involved, but you know it’s not, you’re aren’t blocking off three hours on your Wednesday night and going out to a bar, going out sarging [sp], you know, coordinating with your buddies, all this kind of stuff that makes it feel like work. Oh, and also no calling women.

Andy: No calling women?

Lance: No calling women, no texting them, no email. I mean, you’ll give them a little call or a text just to confirm a date, but none of this calling, pursuing women instead of a date. You do it right then and there and it really just takes all the kind of work out of the system, because it should be fun. So, that’s my thing.

Andy: Yeah, it’s just amazing how little time it actually takes when you really get good at meeting women during the daytime. And another thing that is kind of selfish, but I like, is that it costs a lot less money.

Lance: It costs less money.

Andy: If you’re not going out, I mean, you maybe be buying rounds for yourself or your buddies or whatever. Heck, I don’t even drink anymore. I mean it’s just unnecessary and when you’re meeting women during the daytime it just, it just puts a smile on your face because it’s so darn easy.

Lance: Yeah.

Andy: Yeah. So, well, you’ve heard what I think about DayGame, tell me more about what you think about it.

Lance: Well…

Andy: What makes it so good?

Lance: Well, yeah, it’s just so… It’s cheaper for sure. I mean, for me, the time thing is really huge, but I got to tell you the biggest thing about it is you’re just meeting higher quality women, for me. Because I can go out in the bars and I can meet women and, you know, a lot of, I mean all our instructors can and you can, but what I’ve noticed is that all of our instructors when they really want a quality woman, when they really want to maybe have a girlfriend or maybe, I don’t know, just kind of have a woman in their life, they look to DayGame to provide that. Because…

Andy: Definitely.

Lance: You know, and you just kind of ask yourself because I meet women at like Whole Foods or at the gym, you know I have other cool thing that I do. Like I love to kite board or salsa dancing and you know. It’s like do I want to meet a woman who goes out to 3 am. and drinks which means she probably smokes and I don’t, I’m not a big smoker personally.

Do I want to meet a woman like that who’s constantly meeting men and just kind of like, you know, or do I want a meet a woman who works out, she’s really focused on her career? She has a couple of really focused hobbies, but really she’s kind of too busy, got too many important things going on in her life to just kind of go to bars seeking validation from men, filling up her calendar with dates that she probably won’t show up at.

It’s like what kind of woman do I want to meet? And for me that was the reason that I really started going back to DayGame because you know I did DayGame before I even found the community.

Andy: Right. Right.

Lance: And I did DayGame for I think nine years before I knew the community existed. And I never went to bars, really never went to bars at all, but I certainly never went to bars to meet women. Then I started really getting into BarGame and what happens is there’s, you’re putting a lot of time into BarGame. You just get this kind of rush out of it. It’s something that everyone loves to do.

Andy: Yeah, the adrenaline. Complete adrenaline.

Lance: But then when I got serious about my life I started gaining weight, you know, I actually got laid off. True story. I got laid off from my job because I was always, always tired, always exhausted. I’ve got some stories to go with that, but then I started to get serious about this business and for awhile the business was just fun. I was just going out and meeting women and kind of enjoying the lifestyle of it.

But then I decided I wanted to get serious about it. I knew, wait a minute, I can’t spend four hours a night just hooking up with random women, meeting random women. And when I wanted higher quality women, when I wanted a girlfriend I knew I had to meet her during the day. I didn’t have to, but I knew it would be easier to meet a real quality woman. And I met a great woman in the gym.

Andy: Yeah.

Lance: And she was in shape. She was in shape and she had a great career and she was really smart and she had a real good head on her shoulders. And she didn’t play any of these mind games. She doesn’t go out seeking validation from men, so she doesn’t have these games. So, that’s kind of an obvious thing I think a lot of guys fell like they’ll meet better quality women during the day.

It takes no time. I think that’s pretty intuitive. I met women during my lunch break for years when I was in consulting.

Andy: Right, Right.

Lance: And I worked for a big consulting company. So, I would work in one city for six months, another city for six months, a lot of long commutes, so when I got staffed somewhere new, my big thing was I got to meet a woman in this area. You know, I’m working in Palo Alto now, I’ve got to find a girlfriend in Palo Alto. So, just during my lunch breaks I would get two or three girlfriends in Palo Alto and I’d only like commute two or three days a week and kind of spend the night there.

It was really cool, but you just kind of, it’s really that easy. But here’s something that I didn’t expect from DayGame and I think a lot of guys maybe don’t expect this. It’s way easier to get physical with women during the day.

Andy: Really?

Lance: Way easier, like a million times easier. We talked about this.

Andy: Yeah, yeah.

Lance: It makes common sense. If I meet a woman in a bar, she’s met ten men that night.

Andy: Right.

Lance: She probably goes out all the time. She probably met a hundred men in the last week or the last month or whatever and she’s probably had a lot of dates. She probably just ahs this constant influx of guys in and out of her life and that’s why she’s flaky. There’s nothing wrong with her. She’s just all, you know.

Andy: You’re just another…

Lance: I’m just another guy.

Andy: Another one.

Lance: You know, another guy. Now, if I meet a woman at the gym and you can tell she goes to the gym all the time and you talk to her and she’s got a kickass career. You can tell she’s really busy on her career. If you can get that woman to show up on a date you’re…

Andy: You’re home. You’re home.

Lance: Who knows, it’s amazing the quality of women. I mean, you know the really amazing women that’ll tell you… I had a woman, I met a woman, this amazing Pilipino woman, just six pack abs, really good career, and we started getting kind of hot and heavy on the date. This was one of the kind of last dates I can really remember.

And she kind of started to tense up, but started to resist a little bit and I’m kind if just playing with her and keeping it really cool and really light and she kind of looks at me and she kind of smiles and goes it’s just been a really, really long time since I’ve had sex. And you hear that all the time. And you’re like ok, this is going to be not so hard.

Because here’s a woman, I mean here’s a, I have women coming in and out of my life all the time, here’s a woman who hasn’t been with a man in nine months. Hasn’t been with a man in a year.

Andy: Ouch.

Lance: Or a year or over and you meet those women during the day and no wonder it’s pretty easy and, you know, I don’t know what guys are into. Some guys just want to meet a woman and they want to get physical right away and think that the bar is the easiest place to do that because they think those are the women that are looking for it. But, no, those are the women that have options for that every night.

Andy: Exactly.

Lance: When you meet women during the day, these are the women who never meet men, they’re thirsting for connection, they’re thirsting for conversation, they’re thirsting for a lot of things, but they’re also thirsting for the physical aspects and they don’t have a lot of choice about it.

Andy: So, tell me then, what are the big mistakes that guys typically will do when they are doing DayGame?

Lance: Well I thing doing DayGame, calling it quote unquote DayGame, I would call that a mistake, but I would call that unnecessary. What I like to do is do things that I enjoy doing. I did something interesting. I just joined a new gym and in my mind they had all these new classes and stuff and my thing is, ok, I’m going to go to the gym and every time I’m going to flirt with a woman before the class and after the class I’m going to flirt with one woman and if things go really well I might stay with her.

If not I’m going to make sure I flirt with two women at the beginning of the class. And that’s, is that DayGame? I’m not spending two, I mean, it’s like an hour and a half of my time, but really what I’m doing is I’m getting a workout.

Andy: Yeah, yeah, you know that reminds me is when I first started doing this there were times when a bunch of us guys would get together and we would have these “Hundred Set Sundays” where we would go out for eight, ten, twelve hours and just do new approaches. And by the time you’re getting to the end of it, you’re crawling and it’s not fun.

Lance: Yeah.

Andy: And you’re just doing it for yourself. But, if you are on your lunch break or you’re just going to the grocery store and you’re just walking around and, oh hey, cute girl, I think I’ll talk to her. You’re not gaming her or anything, you just, it’s just, “cute girl, must go talk to her.”

Lance: Yeah, yeah, and I’m not saying it’s a mistake to block out time in your calendar, I mean, you absolutely should do that if you have the time and you want to do that. But I don’t know about that 100 set weekend, that’s a lot. That might be…

Andy: Oh, it was brutal, man.

Lance: But let’s go over the real mistakes. The biggest mistake guys make is simply not approaching a woman they meet during the day. And even guys who are really good at meeting women in bars or got really good at, quote DayGame, they will still fail when they’re distracted by their everyday life and they see an amazing woman. They’ll still…

And I know because I did this for a long time. I’d go out to a bar and I’d talk to any woman. I’d block off time in my calendar. I could just open, open, open, have great interactions, but then when I got distracted, when I was thinking about something else an amazing woman just walked by me on the sidewalk, I’d kick myself, because I missed the opportunity.

And so what you really want to do is you want to get to the point where you have this automatic reflex reaction. You see a woman and you just, boom, you pop right out.

Andy: Right. When you’re doing the NightGame thing you have this whole, your brain is in a certain position, but when you’re out there living your regular life it’s become so ingrained with you where you just turn it on, boom, instantly.

Lance: And, I think it’s like a physical programming. And we’ve got a lot of exercises in the program, because a lot of times guys use a lot of different techniques to start conversations and that kind of, it keeps things really complicated. What I like to do is teach something very, very simple that any guy can use to the point where it just comes out, I’m going to call it a Back Pocket Opener, but there’s all these constructs that the guide goes through. But the idea is you just automatically respond. You automatically get the result.

Another mistake that guys make during the day is they try to hard to be flashy or more commonly they try to be funny for way too long because we’re so… You were taught to entertain women, get them laughing, tell them stories, you know, be this kind of larger than life picture.

And I’ve got news for guys women don’t want larger than life kind of like rockstar guy. They want a guy that can really connect with them, that really sees them, that really feels them, that’s really present with them. And for me if I make a woman laugh and she laughs again and she laughs a third time it’s time to stop.

It’s time to stop and it’s time to build a connection and I see guys miss that. And you can just see the disappointment on the woman’s faces because they say, oh I get it, he’s just here to be funny. I thought he was here to hit on me and that’s not really what’s going on so.

Andy: Yeah, you can literally see it in their face where they’re having fun, she’s into you, but the guy keeps going, he’s not paying attention and any sort of connection that you could have had just kind of slips away. So, it’s just, yeah, it’s exactly what you say. You’ve got to stop as soon as you’ve hit like maybe that third laugh or, and just get real and really get connected.

Now Lance, we were just talking a bit about getting connected. Can you tell me more about what you’re thinking, about what your mind is when it comes about connection?

Lance: Well, connection is absolutely critical. It’s really the most important thing. In that, if I can connect with a woman, nothing else really matters. It doesn’t matter if I’m awkward. It doesn’t matter, you know, if I didn’t use deodorant and I’m stinky and sweaty. It doesn’t matter if my body language is perfect. It doesn’t matter if I have money. I mean, nothing matters, nothing matters, because women are taught, women are just dying for a connection.

They’re just starving for it. Ever since they were little girls they’re taught that there’s this kind of magical moment that’s going to happen where a man’s going to come and he’s going to see them in a different way. And they’re going to feel connected to this person in a way they’ve never felt connected to anyone on their lives. And most women are still waiting for that moment to happen, they’re still waiting for that. They’re just kind of, they’re dying for it.

And if you have connection, you know, she’ll call you. She’ll ask you out for the date. She’ll pursue you because she already feels close to you. She already feels an intimacy and you know for guys, what guys always want, we always want this kind of, this marker of yeah we had sex with her. That’s how we know it’s a real relationship. We had sex. We’re in control.

For women it’s, I feel connected to him, we had intimacy and when you give women intimacy they’ll give you anything you want because that’s what they’ve been craving for and dying for. So, if you’re not really trying to understand a connection with a woman, you’re not really making progress in terms of getting what you want with women.

Andy: So, how do guys mess up with this?

Lance: I think guys are starting to understand the importance of connection, which is really good because a couple years ago they’re weren’t a lot of people talking about connection just like they weren’t a lot of people talking about DayGame until we started talking about it.

Andy: Right.

Lance: I think guys get that it’s important. I think they’re really trying to connect with women, but I think they’re still making mistakes. I see a lot of guys and even a lot of teachers talk about connection as if you’re trying to evoke emotions inside a woman. As if, ok you paint this picture for her or you tell this story or you convey these things about yourself, you’re going to create a feeling inside her.

And if you understand emotions and you study emotions because there’s a lot of books about, “The Social Intelligence” is a really good one. And you really understand how emotions work between two people it never works in the way that someone else reaches inside somebody and creates an emotion inside them. That’s a complete illusion.

Andy: Yeah. It’s so one sided and it’s really not effective.

Lance: Well, it just doesn’t work. The way you create emotion in somebody is you get connected and the connection actually happens instantly. I mean if I walk into a room the women are going to sense it. There’s a connection, I don’t need to do anything to create a connection with women in a room. I just walk in and we’re connected. And if I have a bad energy they’re going to feel that energy right away and they’re going to try and decrease the connection, but they’re still going to feel it, they’re still going to be dragged down.

On the other hand, If I walk in with a high energy and I’m positive and I’m just loving life. I just have this confidence. I just have this feeling we were talking about where you’re just bringing women into your world. You just got that glow. Then women are just going to, I don’t need to do anything they’re immediately going to feel that. So, connection happens automatically and the way you create emotions in other people is you just feel that emotion yourself.

So, when I’m talking to a woman and this sounds counterintuitive, it might sound selfish, but it’s not selfish at all. It’s called leading. I’m leading her into emotion. I’m leading her into intimacy and they way you do that is I look at the dynamic between me and her. Right, I look at her and I get a sense of what does she want? What does she need? What has she been looking for in her life?

And that’s very intuitive and it’s usually very obvious what women want. You can tell by the way they’re looking at you what they want.

Andy: Right.

Lance: And when I know what they want I can just create that in myself. Does she want someone to see her pain? And I’ll connect with what’s going on with me. I’ll tell a story about when things were tough on me. And we’ll create a connection there. Does she just want somebody to just make her life better? Does she just want a pick me up? I’ll just put myself in a positive state and I know that she’ll follow.

And so really it’s about creating emotions in yourself. That’s what connection’s really about. And when you can do that women will follow you because they want to be with men because they want to feel a certain way. And they want to feel that way with someone else, so really it’s about creating emotion in yourself and you’ve got a ton of tools to do that, but it all comes down to feeling a certain way yourself.

Women will do the rest. You just got to lead them and they’ll follow and they may not be able to express their emotions, but you’ll sense if they’re there with you and you’ll sense if that connection is real. And that’s a big mistake is that guys kind of miss that.

Andy: Yeah, one of the things that really struck true with me when I took my courses way back when was when you talked about leading, so many people think of it as leading somebody like a leash, but that’s not what you mean by leading. It’s you go first.

Lance: You go first, yeah.

Andy: So, if you’re trying to make this connection with a person you have to open yourself up to that other person.

Lance: Yeah.

Andy: If you don’t you can’t expect them to open up to you.

Lance: And how’s she going to trust you?

Andy: Yeah.

Lance: So, and the real, (and this isn’t so much a mistake), but I think the limitation that a lot of guys have is they just can’t go there.

Andy: Yeah.

Lance: Most guys aren’t able to express their emotions in different areas and that’s what, you know, the tools we’ve been teaching in the Art of Rapport workshops. We’ve been doing this for, I don’t know, four and a half years now, and it’s a bunch of exercises really designed to get men to access all sorts of emotions.

We’ve got, you know, the mythical youth stories, we’ve got the deep rapport stories. I mean, the Real World Rapport event, you know, Daniel and I got up on the stage in front of 120 people or whatever and we were telling these stories and we were crying and everybody in the audience was crying.

And what’s amazing about it is everybody really got how that was going to make them better with women. Everyone understood like, wow, if I can take a woman, now that I can go to this place in this group of 100 men, if I can just one woman a third of the way there, she’ll do anything with me.

So, that’s what it’s really about. It’s about helping guys open up and obviously we’ve got a lot of exercises and there is a lot of you know emotions in there. It’s not, they’re not easy exercises to do, but they’re so important and the great thing is it’ll make life so much better. You’re friendships are so much better, you’re relationship with your family is so much better. There’s all these other benefits. Of course, guys just do it because they want to meet women.

Andy: Well, yeah.

[laughing]

Lance: But you know most, it’s just true, most guys can’t go to the places that women want to take them and that’s why when you learn this skill it’s so powerful because it’s not easy for other guys to copy. They can’t just copy what you say. They can’t just try an mimic your body language. They have to be able to do emotionally what you’ll be able to do when you do this stuff, so.

Andy: Yeah, it’s really an emotional range because you’ll see some guys (like the guys that never get girls are), they’re emotional, but they don’t have the strength side of it either. Whereas what you teach is great for guys because you do have the emotional register to go there and maybe tell a deep rapport story and cry, but on the other hand, at the same time you are that rock. You’re that solid person that is willing to open up for her.

Lance: Yeah, absolutely, and it’s obviously it’s… I guess I just want to say that this is very specific things you can do. And no, it’s not just about crying with them. Sometimes you need to challenge women. That’s one of my favorite ways to connect to women. I did this in the grocery store just the other day.

I was talking to a woman and she started complaining to me about her job and I looked at her and I said you don’t hate your job. And she looked at me and she was like, “yeah, you’re right.” And that, I challenged her because I just got this sense you know and what’s great about that, challenging women, is even if I was wrong it still creates this impact, you know.

I was like, you don’t hate you job, and she was like, “yeah actually I really, really hate it.” And I look at her and I say, “you know what, you need to leave. You need to get out of there.” And I seriously coached her, as if I’d known her whole life and I was her kindergarten friend and I just discovered she hated her job, I would coach her.

So, what I’m doing is I’m engaging her and I’m feeling the emotions. You need to get out of that job. You know, I’m feeling it and so what makes this work is not what you say to women, but just that you’re feeling something and that makes them feel the feelings and then they feel like, wow, when I’m with this guy we, you know, I do what I love to do. As a woman I love to feel and when I’m with this guy I feel more.

Andy: That is cool.

Lance: That is cool.

Andy: Now, Lance, I’m going to complete like take us, like jump off the tracks and try something else.

Lance: Ok.

Andy: Ok, I have seen the pictures for it already. We haven’t released it yet, but you got to tell me, what to heck is the Obsession Button?

[laughing]

Lance: What’s the Obsession Button? You know what’s funny I’ve been teaching this, I haven’t been teaching, I kind of have some new understandings of this since I’ve been teaching this for years. But, I never called it the Obsession Button. And it’s just kind of the idea. It really is a button you push in women and the reason… Basically what it has to do with is it has to do with an event that women have been waiting their entire lifes for this event to happen.

And what’s been happening is, over the years they’ve been building all these emotions, they have all these images of what it’s going to be like when a man comes and sweeps her off her feet and they have all these ideas. And, what’s interesting about these ideas is these ideas are really biological in nature because these stories are similar across different societies.

And there’s even a whole kind of old kind of, if you look at the old stories of the gods and the goddesses and romances happen and just different kind of mythology you see the same thread running through so we know it’s not just a western civilization thing. Because there’s some real biological urges that express themselves in certain stories of how men meet women.

And also, it’s just constantly reinforced in western society and really probably in most societies unless there’s some kind of heavy religion in control or something like that. But in most societies it’s always reinforced. You have these women born with this certain expectation of an event and having almost this pre-programmed reaction to a certain event. And you see that all the time like Johnny Appleseed is one of my favorites.

[laughing]

He was like the original Kung Fu guy from the eighties where he just rolls into town and causes this woman to fall in love with him and then he leaves the next day.

Andy: You got to love him.

Lance: That’s Johnny Appleseed and everybody, every society has a Johnny Appleseed. It’s the outsider who comes in, he’s very powerful, but then he’s very vulnerable in a certain situation and what he’s doing is he’s pushing that Obsession Button. He pushes the button then he gets the hell out of Dodge.

Andy: After he planted the seed.

Lance: After he’s planted the seed. So, really what the obsession button is, is taking this moment that women have been waiting for and biologically they crave it and they’re constantly being reinforced by it. Every time they look at a magazine ad it seems like. Every time they see a movie. Every time they read a book, Even these celeb magazines, the stories they make up about how celebrities meet each other. Women are constantly being bombarded by this event and they’re constantly saying when is that stuff going to happen to me?

Andy: Yeah, look at every single Disney movie that’s out there.

Lance: I mean, every movie, even crazy movies even like Vin Diesel movies or even just, you know, “Transformers”, you know any kind of just… It’s in, (if you look you see it and you see it as sub-stories), but it’s constantly there and it’s constantly triggering women and when you learn to do that… Most women they haven’t had this button pushed, that’s what’s really amazing. You know, most women they’re still waiting for it to happen.

So, really when you understand that story and you understand what women are really waiting for. They’re not waiting for you to say a certain line. They’re not waiting for you to tell a certain story. They’re waiting for you to feel a certain way. And they know what that feeling is like because they’ve had that feeling every time they’ve read a romance novel, or every time they open a perfume bottle, they feel that feeling and they’re waiting. Who is the guy who’s going to make me feel this way?

So, when you learn to make women feel that way it really is like, “Boom, push a button and I’m…”

Andy: You’re over simplifying it…

Lance: I don’t mean to make it sound devious. But the cool thing about this Obsession Button because I’ve kind of been talking about it to certain guys and using that name, the Obsession Button, and they’re like I don’t want a girl to obsess over me. I don’t want to toy with her emotions. But here’s the thing, if you look at that mythology most of the time it doesn’t end up in a relationship.

Andy: That’s true.

Lance: You remember if you watch the old David Carradine Kung Fu? He never says, “oh, you know what, I’m just going to settle down in this town.” No, he’s out of there the next day and that’s part of the deal. Women expect that and of course if you want a relationship women will be there too. The thing is women will really be with you for as long as you will have them. And they don’t have expectations and you’re not toying with women just by virtue of being the romantic hero. Women want, I mean talk to women about their romantic heroes. They want to be just taken away by this romantic hero and then they want him to leave.

So, they want that memory. They want that feeling of, oh yeah, it happened to me. And even when they’re married twenty years later and they have four kids and they have a husband that they love they can still say when they see that in a movie or read it in a book they can still say, wow that at least happened to me once. And now I’ve got a family and it’s great.

Andy: There was one guy.

Lance: But there was one guy that really made me feel that way. And they won’t feel incomplete and a lot of women they feel incomplete. And a lot of women have had this done to them and they’re still wafting for another guy to come does it because it’s such a rare thing.

And it’s not that hard to do and I’ve been teaching for years. And I’ve been teaching for years in workshops, but I think we’ve really got it down to where a guy can do it in any context because before there had to be a certain situation and now it’s like actually you can do it after the fact.

You can do it on the first date. You can do it in the first ten minutes. You can do it right when you approach. But here’s the mechanism that you need to trigger, so that’s kind of what that is. It’s really just a funny name on something that we’ve really been perfecting for quite a number of years.

Andy: So, you had already talked about doing the approach and then you just finished talking about like, ok pressing that Obsession Button and having her feel these feelings…. Well, what’s next? It seems like the next step is going on some sort of a date or dating or something to that effect.

Lance: Yeah.

Andy: What’s the next step?

Lance: Well, you know the thing I want to say about dating is that most guys I talk to, a lot of guys that I talk to don’t think dating is a problem. I mean you’re looking at me kind of, I mean some guys will say I need to have a game plan. But other guys will come to me and say I can’t get dates and when I have a date it usually works out pretty well.

Those guy’s stories, you know when guys are not very good at meeting women, they not very good at meeting women during the day, they kind of meet women that are kind of, women that don’t have a lot of dates and when you’re with a woman that doesn’t have a lot of dates there’s a really good chance the dates going to go well.

Andy: Right.

Lance: I think you looked at me funny because you’ve been around a lot of guys who aren’t good at meeting women.

Andy: Right.

Lance: And when you get really good and you’ll get really good quickly, you know if you use DayGame and you really master the connection you’ll have a lot of dates relay quickly and you’ll actually be dating women. Some women that don’t date very much, but you’ll start dating really high quality women that even though they don’t go out much and they don’t meet a ton of guys the guys they do meet are really high caliber and they don’t hesitate to ask them out.

So, these women might be going on a lot of dates. So, you’ve got to really nail your date down. The thing I want to say is that if you mess up on a date, is especially a big deal in my mind. I used to get upset when I messed up a date because if I messed up when I approached a woman its like well I wasted 20 seconds. They’ll be another woman, you know, if I messed up with a woman that I met while I was going to lunch maybe I’ll succeed with the woman I meet when I’m going back to work from lunch, you know.

Andy: Yeah.

Lance: There’s another chance or if I mess up in a ten minute conversation then its like, “oh well, ok, I lost ten minutes. I learned something” and that’s fine, but if I mess up during the date, you know, there’s an hour of my life gone, an hour I could have been out, I could have met ten other women.

I could have set up two other dates in that hour if I kind of divided it out in terms of talking to women so I really hate screwing up a date. I really have perfected what a really simple date is and I think what a date does is it really intensifies your ability to make a connection.

Andy: Yeah, you know when I first saw your, the way you go on dates it just blew my mind because I was able to think, ok, I’ve got this amount of time. This is where I want to get to by the end of it. This is what I want; this is the type of connection that I want to create between the two of us. This is the type of emotional connection that we’ve got.

So, instead of having these four hour extravaganzas where you spend all this money, you spend all this time. But what’s more important, is that the “it” that you’re doing eclipses the way you get along. That just really blew it away for me. It’s invaluable.

Lance: Yeah, I mean I got a lot of really good results on my dates, you know. And here’s the thing, And here’s I think why dating is probably the biggest opportunity for most men. A lot of guys still come to me and say they don’t need any help with dating. They don’t really understand dating. They don’t really understand what dating is about.

Let me just say it in black and white so it’s very clear. If a woman agrees to go out on a date with you and she dresses up, she does her hair, she puts on her makeup, and she gets in her car, she gets in a cab and goes somewhere to meet you because she put something in her calendar. If she does that and she shows up she wants to sleep with you.

Andy: Yes.

Lance: Period. She wants to sleep with you. And maybe she doesn’t want to sleep with you that night or maybe she does. Most of the time, I think for any woman, even for a woman that never sleeps with a guy on the same night, even a woman who doesn’t sleep with men until she’s dated them for three months, even that woman she wants things to go so well. She wants to be swept off her feet so completely. She wants to have that moment she’s been waiting for so completely realized that she sleeps with you right then and there on the first date. That’s what she wants and if that doesn’t happen she’s a little disappointed.

Andy: Yeah and that’s your fault.

Lance: You didn’t do your job right. It doesn’t mean that you need to sleep with every woman on the first date but she definitely wants to sleep with you at some point. If it doesn’t go there she’s more than disappointed.

Andy: Yeah.

Lance: She’s like “well I wasted my time. It didn’t go well, maybe the next guy.”

Andy: Yeah, especially when you talk to female friends (that you’re not interested in dating) when they go on dates, they’ll tell you afterwards, “Gosh, I really thought that he would be that guy.” And she is so disappointed when he didn’t step up.

Lance: Yeah. And you got to have a game plan. I mean, you don’t want to script things. You want to think about you and her and the connection, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t plan. You got to have a game plan. You got to be prepared and when you’re prepared and you know how to lead the conversation, you know how to lead the interaction, that’s when you can finally focus on her in a way…

Most men aren’t focused on the woman at all. They’re worried about what they’re going to say next. They’re worried if their bragging too much. They’re worried that they’re not bragging enough. You know, they’re just worried about where they’re going to take things and they’re not able to focus on the women. So, you got to be prepared.

And I’ll give you guys one other tip too on the date. For the first impression on the date one big mistake that no guy should ever be making, but a lot of guys do make is right when you see the woman say something funny, you know, just to get her to laugh once, just once because she’s a little nervous. Everyone’s nervous at the beginning of a date.

Get her to laugh once, laugh with her, feel that tension just kind of ease and then say come here give me a hug, get a hug from her, and then when she gives you a hug be like, no give me a real hug and get a better hug from her. Because what you’re doing right away is you’re saying, oh you’re a little nervous, I’m going to make you comfortable, come here let’s get close, oh you know what actually we’re going to get closer than you’re used to and then you sit down and then you work on that connection.

You know, obviously there’s a lot to go into how to make that connection but have a real plan and really lay it out. I forgot exactly how they create their own plan, theor own dream date they can bring women through.

Andy: Yeah, that’s just a really great thing when you do have a general game plan it does allow you just to get out of your own mind and put your attention on that person and just really take things far. I love the fact that you’re talking about just removing any sort of nervousness because she’s probably even more nervous than you are.

Lance: Yeah.

Andy: And when you come in there you dispel the nervousness, it’s gone.   “Let’s have fun, let’s get to know each other.” It’s really just an ingenious way to go about doing it.

So, I’m just going to completely derail things one more time.

Lance: Ok.

Andy: But the event you had last year… I think it was about a year and a half ago, last year, you did the Real World Rapport event.

Lance: Yeah.

Andy: Can you talk about that?

Lance: Yeah. It was an amazing event for me because we had a lot of really great products out there, I mean Fearless First Impressions, Charismatic Conversations, I mean, Zero Drama Dating was a great event and a great product. But we never really revealed the material I think we were best known for, which I think is the Real Rapport workshop.

And we were the first to go out there teaching DayGame and this was back, I think, in the beginning of 2005, we were taking guys out, really focused on meeting women during the day and building connections with women. That was a long time ago and we’ve really been perfecting it for years. But we’ve never released that kind of material in a big seminar event and I also learned a lot since I created the Art of Rapport.

And the thing is the Art of Rapport is most of it’s exercises and it’s very hands on and it was hard to go into the detail that I really wanted to go into, so this was my chance to really teach the material that I was really known for, was most proud of, had the most impact, but really teach it in the detail that I wanted to for the first time.

It was pretty unique material even for us and I think it’s unlike anything anyone else has ever taught. But the other cool thing about it is we’re able to incorporate a lot of things from the workshop, so. You know, you were at the event, a big part of the event was me explaining concepts, but an even bigger part of the event was exercises.

I mean, so I would do exercises with women, you know I would show guys exactly how it worked. I would bring guys up on the stage. I would do exercises with them so you could watch them transform and then you could see them, you know, actually perform these things and actually kind of connect with women, start conversation with women and even go on dates with women. And you get to kind of watch them grow.

It really, I think it’s great for guys because they really, ok now I know the whole path, I don’t, because a lot of times you just show a guy where he needs to go, but he doesn’t know the path to get there.

Andy: Right, right.

Lance: To be able to capture that whole thing, ok, here’s what you need to do, here’s what it looks like and here’s what it looks like when a guy moves across that path even in ten minutes here’s how he moves through that path and gets where he needs to go.

Andy: That was just a really cool thing starting from just doing the initial approach all the way through going on that first date. And taking every single step on that path with them. It was just really invaluable.

Lance: Yeah. It was also the first event where we concentrated completely on DayGame, completely on connection, completely on dating, just really focused on those three key events.

Andy: So, let me ask you then, so how was it different from say like the other stuff that you do, specifically like the Fearless First Impressions or Charismatic Conversations? You talked about now you’re teaching the whole linear progression; every step of the way, but what is it specifically about the Real World Rapport that made it different than everything else?

Lance: One other too that I haven’t mentioned yet that makes it pretty unique is the dream team of natural dating that I brought together. That was one thing I was really proud of about that event. I was really excited about it because before we’d done a lot of exercises, a lot of our products have this format of you know seeing where you need to go, seeing it performed, watching other guys go through the transformation.

But what I was able to do this time was bring in a lot of people that I really wished back. A lot of people I looked up to for years actually came to present at this event, so I mean I can go through the list, Zan was there who’s actually a guy I’ve looked up to forever. I got to watch Zan go on a date which was really fun seeing that. Brent was there, I got to see Brent.

Andy: Brent Smith.

Lance: Yeah. Brent Smith, I got to see him just do what he does which I’ve seen a lot, but always seen it from a difference.

Andy: Right.

Lance: And I put him through a juggernaut of all these different situations and under each situation he does exactly what he did and I really understand what he does so much better now. Even after seeing all the interviews, I’ve still never seen him do what he did. Kind of celebrities in the industry, we had J-Dog who was on “The Pickup Artist, Season 1”; he used to be my old roommate. He used to coach for us way back in the day before he became famous. He was there. Carlo Xuma was there. Grant Adams was there. Sean Stevenson was there.

Andy: Sean Stevenson, oh, that guy’s my hero.

Lance: Yeah, one of the most inspiring guys you’ll ever meet. He was there. He did an amazing job. David Wygant was there. He’s so much fun. Everybody likes him.

Andy: My God.

Lance: It was fun. When you’ve got a guy like David Wygant. And also the Pickup 101 instructors, like Sean Deacon was there. Daniel Johnson was there, Eric Disco. And when you’ve got those guys in a room you can just be like, do this. And they all just do it. And people have seen these guys. They’ve seen a lot of their interviews, but they’ve never seen them do a lot of stuff and they’ve never had it really kind of broken down. They’ve never really seen them work with students.

So, we got all these people together and I’m sure I’m missing people. I’ll have to apologize because I missed them, because there was so many people there who were kind of helping out. Oh, Dave M.

Andy: And Decker.

Lance: Yeah Decker. So, yeah, I mean Dave M was really cool because he is so good at making sure women show up on the date. He does a lot of online dating which I really don’t teach. But I’m so intriqued by how he meets women, because for me it’s a lot easier to make sure women show up on a date. For him it’s a little more work and we get to see him do exactly what he does. It’s a lot if fun.

Decker with AMP. It’s amazing what he does.

Andy: Yeah.

Lance: Really, really interesting. I think a lot of the guys will get a lot out of that. So, it was just fun to have everybody there and just really, it was like my, it was my dream event. It was like all the things that I wanted to learn from my heroes and no matter how many times I’d seen them on other products or how many interviews I’d seen there still were aspects that I didn’t understand and I never really felt like I’d seen them do exactly what they do.

So, I was able to bring them there and I’m bold with these guys man. I made them do, like Zan I remember, I had to practically wrestle him to the ground to get him to stop explaining because he’s very good at explaining what he does, but I wanted to see him do it.

Andy: Right, right.

Lance: And then get the explanation later. So, that was a lot of fun and man I was just too lit up when we did this event. I’m always excited for events because you’ve got 100 guys that paid a lot of money, they traveled across the world. But I remember being way more excited for this even than I’ve ever been for any event in my life.

Andy: Really? So, what was the main reason that had you so pumped up then?

Lance: Well, I mean, a part of it was the material, you know. This was really my masterpiece because you know the DayGame, the Rapport stuff, I’ve been working on that, I’ve been teaching that for five years. And other guys were just starting to teach it and kind of teach watered down versions of it.

Andy: Right.

Lance: And I wanted to really show the world what we developed and in my mind this is really my masterpiece. And I was so thrilled. And you know there was a lot, there was some personal stuff going on too, because you know, you went through this. Before the event we had some coaches break away and try to do their own company, which is fine, but you know during the process they were kind of slamming us and I think that it was their marketing plan, to kind of attack Pickup 101, and I think they had this idea that we were going to crumble. That we weren’t going to survive, which was kind of crazy.

Andy: Yeah.

Lance: It’s tough to see that, tough to kind of go through that, but I was like, “you know what? I’m going to put together the best event we’ve ever done to show the world what we really have been teaching and what we’re really capable of and I’m going to bring everybody together.” It was so fun to see that really come together and the guys who were there, they really know. And you see it!

I just was looking at the videos, because I’ve never seen it. The guys who were here at the event… Guys came up to me after the event and they shook my hand and some guys were crying and it was amazing to get so much love from people.

But I just now got a look at the video of some of these guys who were talking about their experience at the event. Amazing. To just kind of be like, wow, that’s what we’re really about, and I’m glad to see that people really got what we’re about.

Andy: Yeah, you know what cool? I just went to a work related event in Vegas recently, and I happened to run into one of the guys that was at the event and we sat down and over drinks, he just gushed about how much he loved the event – And this is a year and a half later!

Lance: Yeah.

Andy: A year and a half later he comes up to me, just saying how much the Real World Rapport event meant to him. And how it completely changed his life. So, I got to tell you: Having somebody do that with you is just really mind boggling and it felt really, really good.

Lance: I was actually just in Austin.

Andy: Right…

Lance: And a guy who’s friend actually went to the event, (he’d been through some of my other products), but his friend was actually at the event and he told me, “I’ve been waiting for this product for a long time. It’s been a year and a half and people have been asking, are you going to release it, you know, what’s going to happen with it.”

Andy: So, yeah, that’s kind of big question… Why hasn’t it been released yet?

Lance: Why hasn’t it been released? You know, there’s a lot of reasons. I got kind of lazy, I think. It was so exhausting putting on that event, getting everyone together. It was really a lot of work and I kind of just took the summer off. I just went kiteboarding a lot and you know, I just got really busy. When I kind of got back to it we had a lot of other things going on.

You know, we had to release Zero-Drama Dating, which is you know completely different material that I’m also really proud of. But it took us a long time to get that together and then when I looked at it I was kind of done and I had space in my calendar to really look at it. It was just so big. It was just such a huge… Because it was a four day event.

Andy: Right.

Lance: And it was the first time we had done a four day event and we had all these guest speakers and they were all so talented. It’s like I felt like we had to get everything. I didn’t even mention Bad Boy was there.

Andy: That’s right.

Lance: Bad Boy came in from, I mean, he came in from Europe. And we had such a great conversation. He’s just such an amazing guy.

Andy: I love that guy.

Lance: So having all these guys together. The thing too, is we were filming during the lunch breaks and during the dinners. We were doing these small group exercises and I wanted to include that, even though it wasn’t part of the event. I almost felt like that would be more valuable to somebody who wasn’t there.

When you put it all together it’s just this huge package. And people were telling me just to break it into segments. Just to release the DayGame and then release the Rapport and then release the Dating and that kind of seemed to make more sense. But it didn’t kind of feel right, like I didn’t want to charge guys three times.

Andy: Right.

Lance: You know and some day we might break it into packages and release it that way. But what I really wanted to do is just give it to guys in the way that I really intended it. I wanted to give guys all the skills they needed to really change their lives, really transform their lives. The reason it’s being released now is because I finally found a way I wanted to get it out to the world and what I really want to do and what I’m really excited about is kind of creating coaching around it to make sure guys get through the material, make sure guys hget the kind of pieces they need.

Andy: Yeah, yeah.

Lance: To really go through and really get the results they want. I don’t want them just having something, you know, a box in their library. That’s not the goal. The goal is to get guys results.

Andy: Yeah there worst thing ever, is for somebody to spend a whole bunch of money to buy a product from us and then it sits just on their shelf just gathering dust. It doesn’t help them. It doesn’t help… It doesn’t make us (or them) feel good and the whole coaching program that you talk about is just really the best way to do it. So what’s that all about?

Lance: Yeah, well I’m actually calling that the “Instant Intimacy Blueprint” because it obviously incorporates the material and the recordings from the Real World Rapport event and then wrapping it up in a three month coaching package. They’ll be a whole month focused on DayGame and you get to review all the material from the Real World Rapport event on DayGame and every week you get an assignment from me so it’s like, ok, this week you need to watch this DVD and then you need to go and create this kind of thing that you’re going to use and go out there and try it on five women and come back and report back.

And we’re going to have a forum. I’m real excited to participate in the forum. I haven’t been really active in forums for awhile, but I’m real excited to get back and work with these guys in a forum. And we’re going to have some coaching calls from some of the guest instructors so it’s really going to be coaching to kind of put them through the whole progression.

So, a month on DayGame, a month on Rapport, then a month on Dating. So, it’s a three month program and it incorporates all the material from the Real World Rapport event. It incorporates a lot of coaching from me, a lot of forum coaching, a lot of calls from the other people that participated, really the “Dream Team of Natural Game” is what I’m calling these guys. These are all the guys that I’ve looked up to, and a lot of them are helping out.

And let me tell you actually Andy, a story about how this idea of the three month coaching really came about. It’s actually not a new idea. Way back in 2004, I realized that “ok I’m getting too busy… I can’t teach all the guys who want coaching from me.” You know I was leading workshops pretty much every weekend, and then we were still having to push guys away. So I was like, “ok, we need more coaches.”

And I had a lot of people who obviously wanted to be coaches, but they weren’t where they needed to be. And I basically said, “You know what? If I want coaches that really can teach the quality that I want it to be taught at, I need to put these guys through a three month coaching program.” And we did that. What did we call it? Do you remember the name?

Andy: Oh gosh, I really don’t remember.

Lance: We ran it twice. It was called the Path to Mastery is what we called it.

Andy: That’s right.

Lance: And we did it twice. You know I’m not sure when we did the first one I think it was 2005 when we did it. And we did two in 2005 and that’s when we thought. And we only did it twice. I had more instructors than I, all quality instructors and so I never did it again because I could only do it for local guys in San Francisco. And I always wanted to do that in a way that benefited everyone in the world.

Andy: Yeah you guys were doing that. I think you were finishing the second one right when you hired me. I caught like the very tail end of it.

But to kind of piggy back on that whole thing… One of the things they used to do: You’d have weekly coaching calls. And for even myself, having gone through the workshops, the worst thing that can happen is to just settle back into your mundane life.

But knowing that I was going to have a coaching call Monday… Where I had to show up and tell what I’d been up to for the past week; it kind of lights a fire under your butt.

Lance: The weekly component is absolutely essential to making this kind of change in your life because these are real changes. These are changes in your physiology, changes in your emotional structure. If you don’t visit it every week, you’re not really going to make the change you want. That’s really the point and it’s not going to be a huge program for a lot of people. You can do the light version. You can do the heavy version, depending how much time you have to dedicate, but even if you just have two hours a week you can go through the program (and the key is consistency). And so getting the homework assignment, following it and going to the forum if you want; Just kind of seeing all the progress that everyone else is going to make.

Andy: So you do or you do not have to be able to do all three months?

Lance: It’s whatever guys want, you know. Hopefully guys will go through it in the three months’ period; I think that’s how to get the most out of it. But if you want to just break it up and do it at your own pace that’s fine. Some people are going to go through it very quickly.

Here’s an example: Charismatic Conversations was a big product. But, I remember we did our big launch and I talked to a guy who’d won a free one-on-one coaching call. He’d gone through everything. He really attacked it. But everyone’s going to go through their own pace. Some people may be busy right now; they’ll buy the program & will go through it later. All the recordings & assignments will be available for the guys.

But the key point – we want everyone starting at the same time. That’s why we’re only going to make it available for a couple of days and then we’re going to close it off. We really want everyone working through it as a team. Teamwork is another main component. There’s a couple levels, too. I’m being a little vague, because I’m actually having a call tonight with a bunch of guys who were at the Real World Rapport event and I’m going to ask them “If you could get your dream coaching program, working with this material, what would it be?” So I am going to take their suggestions, but it’s definitely going to include a forum, it’s definitely going to include weekly assignments, it’s definitely going to include calls with myself and a lot of the other coaches and there’s probably going to be a high-end program for those guys who want more personal attention with our coaches, or personal attention from me. There’ll be different options. But the key is going through it with a bunch of guys and really going through the weekly assignments. Even if you have just a little time, (or if you have a lot of time you can go into much more detail) but just touching upon it every week to get the transformation you really want over a 3 month period.

Andy: That is awesome.

Lance, this has been a great time talking with you about this; it’s been a while since you and I have been able to just sit down and talk about women, instead of the business side of things.

Lance: Yeah, Andy. It’s really exciting talking about this event, because I’m so passionate about it, I’m so excited. It really is my masterpiece. I really encourage the guys, if you really want to see what I have to offer & what I’m all about, then it really is this event. This is the event that I really was building up for, really for 5 years. So I’m excited that we’re going to go through it and all the changes that the guys want to see.

Andy: Wonderful. Lance, thank you so much for joining me on this, and I do appreciate it, and for everybody listening, thank you very much for listening to this and hopefully we’ll be able to talk to you soon.

Lance. Thanks Andy.

Andy: Thanks.

Check out this student on who was able to do it within a week of his workshop!

See for yourself:

Are you going to join me at THE premier pickup event of the year?

On October 17-19, 2008 the greatest pickup artists and dating coaches in the world are going to descend on Los Angeles. And you should be there too!

This is an incredible opportunity to meet and hang out with all the TOP guys in the dating science community. And it’s actually kind of funny, because this is the kind of thing we don’t normally EVER do.

See, by sending this out, we’re letting you know about an event that is hosted by a direct competitor. But we have enough confidence in what we teach to put our instructors up on the same stage as the other elite pickup artists and dating gurus from around the world, and to let you know about it.

Not only that, but the Super Conference deserves credit for inviting the best guys from around the world, regardless of where they come from. Not only Pickup 101, of course, but also Brad P, Sinn, Dr Paul, and more. To say nothing of the Mystery Method Corp / Love Systems guys who are hosting it, like Savoy, The Don, Cajun, and more.

AT this point you may be wondering… How come I don’t see YOUR name on the list, Lance.

Hey, it’s a good question, but I do have a pretty good answer.

Turns out the event is on the same day as my birthday.

Hey, I have NO problem hanging out with all of you during my birthday, but I did have a feeling a certain woman I’m dating might have something already planned for me that weekend.

After all, last time we had an event to celebrate she ‘borrowed’ a 60 foot sailboat from her boss, gathered a group of my best friends (some of whom are from out of town and I hadn’t seen in over a year!) and took us on a private cruise to angel island.

Anyway I asked her how she would feel about celebrating down in LA and she got a little flustered. It was pretty clear she already had plans for me that she didn’t want to share and based on her track record it’s probably not something that easy to reschedule.

So, yeah, I’m not sure exactly what’s going down for me on that weekend, but I’m pretty sure it would be a BAD IDEA for me to miss out on it.

So… to summarize.

IF you have a hottie planning a mystery birthday party for you on the particular weekend of the conference -in a DIFFERENT city than the conference – then I’d suggest skipping this message, skipping the superconference, and getting back to your day.

For the rest of you… I know this is a bit last minute but if there’s any way you can clear your schedule and make it to this event I would highly recommend it.

Why, you ask?

First of all our very own head instructor Daniel Johnson (of the Daniel Johnson show, as he likes to say) is going to be occupying a privileged spot at the Love Systems Superconference coming up in October.

And he’s got a talk put together that is absolutely PACKED with brand new material on a topic we’ve been working on a lot.

We call it ‘Romantic Empathy’ and while it may sound a bit Opra-esque (yes, I DID just create a new word there) it has that power to have some serious real-life effects on your love life in no time flat.

You should also know that since Savoy and I go back about 4 years now, I’m able to make you a great offer to attend the Superconference. Three offers really. And one of them involves The Playboy Mansion – so keep reading!

Here are some of the KILLER sessions at the Superconference:

* Social Circle Mastery
* Advanced Attraction
* Deep Comfort
* Inner Game
* Relationship Management and MLTRs
* Callback Humor
* Project Rockstar – How they changed their lives and how you can too!
* Day Game
* Body Language
* LIVE EXERCISES: Teasing and Bantering – How to think on your feet!
* LIVE EXERCISES: Physical Escalation – Touching gets results!
* LIVE EXERCISES: Vocal Projection – Watch your results really take off!
* LIVE EXERCISES: Body Language
* LIVE EXERCISES: Approaching and Transitioning
* And lots more…

I always see “lots more” at the end of lists and don’t believe it – but here you have to. The Super Conference runs two simultaneous rooms – a “main stage” where Daniel and other top experts will be presenting on our areas of specialty, so you get the expert take on every subject, and a “breakout room” where these same instructors are running exercises training you on all aspects of your game. So there’s a ton to choose from!

Still, I have to say the COOLEST thing about the event HAS to be…

Get ready for it.

The Playboy Mansion!

What else can I say? Platinum Level Superconference attendees will do their in- field work at The Playboy Mansion! And there may never be another chance like this again. Most of you already know Fox News has reported that October 31, 2008 will be the last of the wild nights Hef personally throws.

This is probably your last chance to party at The Playboy Mansion with the most beautiful women in the World! Are you going to take it?

Note: I heard the Platinum Level package is filling up FAST! If you want in on The Playboy Mansion get yourself registered NOW!

And, as a Superconference attendee you’ll also have access to incredible new products and programs – stuff that ISN’T available to the public yet.

Right now, they have three great packages for you to get the best Superconference experience!

Platinum Level – This incredible top level package includes a private meet and greet with Savoy and the other top Love Systems instructors, two incredible nights of in- field training in the incredible venues of Los Angeles, a full night of training and partying at The Playboy Mansion and full insider access to all the incredible sessions at the Superconference!

Gold Level – This is another top level package that includes the private meet and greet with Savoy and the other top Love Systems instructors, two incredible nights of in-field training in the incredible venues of Los Angeles and full insider access to all the incredible sessions at the Superconference!

Silver Level – This basic package is loaded with value and incredible learning opportunities! The Silver Level Package gives you full, 100% insider access to ALL the great Superconference seminars and sessions.

http://www.LoveSystems.com/super-conference

This Superconference is shaping up to be an absolutely INCREDIBLE, OFF THE CHARTS experience this time around. This is going to be an awesome, not to miss event and I really hope you can join Daniel and some of the greatest pickup artists IN THE WORLD for this incredible three day Superconference!

Talk soon,

Lance Mason

P.S. – Savoy is so sure you’re going to be blown away by all the incredible value and talent packed into this Superconference that he told me to make you this offer: If, by the end of the first day, you’re not absolutely psyched about EVERYTHING you’ve learned at the Superconference, just let him know and he’ll give you a FULL refund!

It’s always good to know that someone stands behind their product. Learn more:

http://www.LoveSystems.com/super-conference

P.P.S. – Daniel Johnson WILL be available for one-on-one coaching during the nights and evenings of the event (Oct 17 – 19th) – INCLUDING a possible night of coaching inside the PLAYBOY MANSION.

Heck, I’D pay for that.

If you’re interested or have questions you can email him directly at

Daniel@PickUp101.com

Good question.  Physical Confidence is what you give off when you have the body language of an Alpha Male. In the same way you can spot the Alpha Male chimp or the Alpha Dog in a pack of wolves, we as humans know when a guy is confident through his body language.

The difference is, we as humans can change both our Body Language and our Confidence.  You might even say  it’s the outer game way to change your inner game.

Do you need Physical Confidence?

Watch the video, listen to what men and WOMEN have to say about it, and discover for yourself….

More information on the Physical Confidence Program

OK, so you’ve seen my Pickup video. Now watch as a couple of my instructors and I explain what I did and why…