The First Impression and Lance’s 1-2-3 ‘Back-Pocket’ Opener:
July 16, 2008 · Print This Article
Please tell me what you think of the video in the comments section below. If you guys like it, I may put up some more free videos for you!
If you are a VIP member or have been to a workshop, chances are good you’ve been taught this and have even used it in your daily life. If so please leave a comment on how this is working for you! I’ll be checking the comments and love hearing success stories, and will also be on hand to answer questions that come up in the comments section.
wow, cool video!
it’s really helpful seeing it in action, and especially getting to hear the timing of what you’re saying.
also, what you were talking about at the beginning about first impressions is right on… I was just thinking back to some recent interactions with women I’ve had where I totally thought I was doing better than I was. lookining back now, it’s because the initial impression wasn’t good at all!
Hey!
I didn’t like the first example at all. Soo artificial and not really congruent. Bringing her to laugh by rating her flirting-ability might work in a bar when everybody is drunk (not my game).
BUT, you really broke down the steps nicely and explained each purpose. This helps me much more and now I can think of variations and applications for my style.
Thanks
Not to sound like a skeptic or anything, but all that is bullshit, it’s in a contrived environment, the girl he approached already is assigning high value to him.
He could have said, “do you have the time, goo goo gaa gaa I eat my own shit” and she would have responded. plus this guy is extremely good looking.
Excellent video. Seein you do actually doing the pick up in front of us is amazing. What’s great too is the way you explained all the finer points which although I’ve been in the game for a while have never seen before. You rock, Lance!
I love it! Good to see the step-by step approach, and the importance of getting the timing right. I like the playfulness, definately gonna strive more for that in future interactions.
Good info. Keep em coming.
yea, i agree! great insight of the whole communication as it looks like in real life…i like it how Lance goes into details of a real situational “pick up”…though i have a questions as i dont like that communication is based on current good vibe…what if i am in a bad mood?
later, I.
What you and DeAngelo and Strauss and all the guys in this field are doing is helping men gain confidence around women. And that’s good. Because, bottom line, it’s confidence that attracts women.
Good job,
Jane
I like the way you dissect the beginning of a relation
by going back to what you did up to the first impression
Great video, short, simple and very easy to do.
Please keep doing it
Anyone know we re this clip is from ?
This video drives home the need to have a standard opening that will work anywhere. looking back at my own openings, I have always felt stressed when trying to come up with something off the cuff and not feeling and appearing relaxed trying to come up with the next untested line. This really focuses on the need to keep doing it over and over until it feels good. Very good demostration.
Sorry, man…but I’d NEVER open any approach with the phrase “excuse me…”, because that it the immediate indicator of the ‘nice boy’—and it automatically lowers a man’s status to a woman. That phrase may be a courteous habit, but it’s toxic, and is like stepping into a pot hole up front. Avoid “excuse me” at all costs. He should know better!
Hey, Lance, this is really great! I think in this 13 minute video you just about summed up an effective approach. Gonna have to try this immediately!
Hope you do more of these quick tip videos.
Lance / Team
I just wanted to say that I am new to this whole “how to” scene after 15 years of marriage and I like your product. It is different in the way that you never stop servicing the customer, not even after the sale. Your first impression technique is a cool way to put both the guy & girl @ ease during a moment that can be stressful for each. Keep up the good work! You are making a difference.
Sam
i love this please send me some videos
What if you feel un comfortable touching the girls hand or you have had bad experiences when you get to close. The idea of making the girl laugh is great that has worked with me. Some women dont like to be touched to early on and that is tough to get passed.
Thanks Lance
i love this it is so so pefect please send some more of this staff
The video is very interesting. I have tried what you said and once it is done properly it always work. First impression is so important.
Video not working here in Safari.
Great video, thanks - this is exactly what I need - seeing some of these ideas in action.
Feels good. And that is essential. I want to feel good, when flirting. Then I know that the girl feels good too.
I think Lance’s Techniques would be much more powerful if he didn’t shy off the words as much like “i just came over here to flirt with you”. See pickup podcasts set on what “shyness” is on the gambler interview. AS you can even see from the girl in the video, she is not overly attracted to Lance especially when Lance starts utilizing his shy, almost equivocal tone.
Hi
If one tried to touch someone on the street just meeting them ,you are at risk of really turning off the girl or worse ,she starts screaming don’t touch me
Fantastic video. I’m just amazed. Seeing is definitely learning! Happy to be the second one to leave my comments. More please!
Hi, I like the work of your company so I took the time to check out this video. It was a good approach in general and I’ve no doubt that it could and probably does work for you.
I do have several small things to say about it, however:
- They might not laugh at the “I’m just here to flirt with you” bit ergo ruining proceedings;
- It does seem to gimmicky- think about how many times she’s been hit on and how many times she’s had to listen to some guy’s “bit” and would probably be more impressed if you hit on her naturally rather than used a “bit”;
- You’re providing a running commentary on the pick-up when you’re telling her you’re hitting on her. Chances are, she knows you are;
- When you do tell her you’re hitting on her you’re putting her on the spot by making her come to a risky decision: “Do I stop and flirt with this complete stranger on the off chance that I might want to get to know him better?”;
- I’m a keen advocate of ‘kino’ but it can be invading if not done well so tread carefully when doing that to a girl you’re trying to pick-up from the street as it might signal warning lights in her mind’s eye. Warning signals might not allow the pick-up to proceed.
That was just me being pedantic but I think you guys are doing a great job in any matter.
Regards from London,
Fojee_Rajpuri
Lance,
Good job, but anyone that has taken the AOR will learn that in the workshop. There are so many details that you did, that no one is even mentioning unless you know what to look for. I love how you touch her lightly 4-5 times in each approach before letting her grab your hand. In addition, I love how you turned your body forcing her to turn with you. Also, to the people that think that opener won’t work, I will tell you it does. When I took AOR I used that same opener and it got the girls smiling almost right away. The thing is, it a “direct” approach and going direct shows you have balls size of cantalopes. Thats just my $.02.
hey just saw your vidio lance but i had just sat down with a couple of girls that had taken my lunch table,when i whalked back and said are u girls joining me for lunch,cause u are at my table, they both embarest,but that broke the ice too meet and qualify two woman that 1 minute before did not know ,and i goofed around with them ,so they felt relaxed with me a total stranger sitting down with them and the one said sit next to her, her hair came down and with in about two minutes,she was telling me her passions and dreams,even the other one as well and she was married,then we started telling jokes to each other so the key to have woman in my life is to defintly make them comfortable around u so that can have a relaxed time ,to do more with u .THANKS RANDY HOUSTON . IT JUST INCREASES THE CIRCLE OF WOMAN AND THE GIRL ON UR VIDIO IS A STUNNER,AND U ARE RIGHT WOMAN WANT THE MAN TO DO THOSE THINGS TO HER CAUSE I HAVE FOUND 99%of woman loved being touched ,and thats way more than what most men do mostly nothing
I have respect for PU101 but the only things that bugs me is that Lance uses his girlfriend on examples which is harder for me to believe. If it’s done in the real world, in real situation it’s differ.
I have continually failed to pick up a girl at my area’s #1 rated night club located in a marina. The bar tenders and managers are my frineds and they say it the hardest club to pick someone up at. However, I have a large yacht moored on the bulkhead and everytime I invite girls to party on board, almost all who I invite show up in numbers of 30 or more (I also invite the guys I know to make it a real party). I had to resort to this show of money to pick up a girl until I used these techniques. Now I can report that nearly every time I approach a single girl with these openers, I succeed. The best part is that now I don’t have to tell them I have a yacht - it’s all me. Thank you very/very much.
Hey Lance,
Your smooth dude. I just love watching video’s of this stuff. Keep em’ comin. It makes it really clear to actually “see” what’s going on, rather than read it in an e-book and try and figure out the body language, voice tempo, etc.
In fact I learned a tonne from your segment in David D’s Advanced program on body language. I must have watched that DVD segment 20 times now. I haven’t sat, or stood the same since! LOL
My favorite part of this video was the flirting in the grocery store. I’m going to do that immediatley with a few girls and see what reaction I get. You just cannot describe in words exactly what your doing there… it must be shown on video for it to click.
Here’s a couple ideas for possible future video’s I’d love to see.
1) when you get a bad reaction from a girl in a pick up and she’s really not into it, what are some way’s you can back off and opt out with a bit of class…especially if you have an audience?
2) Post number 3 does make a good point at the end. I’d love to see some of this stuff done by a couple of your students who aren’t great looking guys, but have developed the basics and can pull it off smoothly. Nothing has amazed me more than watching a fat little ugly guy use this stuff and score. It removes all doubt in a persons mind that this stuff works!!
Thanks!!
Liked the examples, and Im very possitive having small videoclips like this in my mailbox
eh yeah well I need more practice on being comfortable around beautiful girls and no nervousness.//
Great that you bring down the approach in pieces, step by step.. at first I totally missed that part about the timing. I would definitely have made a fool of myself doing the approach to fast..
Helpful, I liked the discussion of what you’re doing, good for building confidence seeing it in action, however Yuko’s response was a little too easy to be believed. Overall, it was pretty good.
Thanks
great basic stuff if i do say so myself, but i like something with a little twist. Neil Strauss shows some great openers in The Game a must read check it out if you’re serious
send me more video’s………..
I think the video has a good presentation and you seem like a cool guy. However, in regards of the opener, I would’nt say “excuse me” and certainly will not touch her as much, not until she’s starts smiling. Body language seemed good, a smile after its always important, yet during my openers I dont project sexual interest towards them. From my little experience, attractive women 8’s and 10’s are aware of men’s intentions right from the 1st few seconds, therefore I find it more effective when they can’t figure out if I’m attracted to them, or I’m just an interesting guy. Either way, I am open minded, and always willing to experiment … I’ll test-out the opener a few times, and draw my conclusion then. Thanx Lance, sarge on!
Major props Lance,
I’m glad you went more in-depth with the “hand test”. I’ve done it with girlfriends in the past but never really tried it on a girl I was picking up. I’ve got to give some major credit to Sean Deacon’s post about texting with a girl(it’s working wonders for me) Here is the link for that for all of you guys http://www.pickup101.com/blog/how-to-text-message-women-with-examples/
I was there when he recorded this, and yes, it was a contrived environment, but from the MANY students I’ve taught and seen this taught to, who’ve used this exact approach, I can tell you that it DOES work, no matter what you look like or where you are.
Great Introduction to Day Time Interactions, Lance. One of the common problems most of us run into is…What do we do after getting the initial laugh? Some gurus say that do not ask “Where are you from”, “What do you do?”…..What would be a good thing to continue conversation on…..
The first video was awesome…..Keep posting them Lance….I love your teaching…You are the best at teaching guys natural stuff..
thanks alot.I need all the help you got ,but do to my current situation I cant afford to buy your vidieos
hi lance,
This starter was excellent,I had seen you on David D’s advance dating series speaking on body language and i just want to say YOU are a ‘MAN’
david
I have taken PU101 workshops, and I have tried this opener. It works when done exactly the way Lance does it, even in a cold approach. The element of surprise is what does it. Cool, Lance!
Kojo
I like the idea of asking the time as a misdirection to ease a woman’s defenses. And being upfront in a playful way that your real intention is to flirt. To the gentleman who objects to saying “excuse me,” thinking it’s wussy supplicating, you’ve got to realize you’re not in a bar, you’re approaching her in a random, non-social setting. You want to be as non-threatening as possible. Also known as being an iron fist in a velvet glove.
great I have not seen the master Sean videos for quite some time alway great to see the Dojo at work
Suave
My bad I meant to say Dojo Lance Mason
Suave
Hey Lance
While this can definitely work, I do not like the way how you present it as a ‘magic bullet’. This is exactly how the PU community has been creating ‘PU creeps’ out of men unsuccessful with women but otherwise great guys.
Just imagine, a nervous guy trying this out with a girl in the street, stuttering while he is saying ‘I am just here to flirt with you’, touching her, and then not having anything else to say, or immediately going into banter lines that might work in a bar when people are drunk (such as “Do not look at me like a fat kid looks at a cheeseburger”). That would definitely creep a girl out, even if she liked the guy from his appearance.
So, please, do not forget to tell guys that they first have to work on their inner mind, making sure that they are confident around women. Once they are, this stuff could be one of many things appropriate in certain situations, but they might not need it at all.
good video, like to see hidden camera see it this works in real world. thank you sam.r
good video. thank you, would like see hidden camera out on the town in real life. that would be interesting keep up the good work. sam.r
Lance: I find this to be very informative, I am a recent widower and really have very litttle knowledge in the art of picking up women. I will try this approach and see how it works. I especially like the detail in this presentation. With Appreciton :Joe
Bud, you have got that soooo right…..timing is everything.
Thanks for the vid……havin a visual and explained is far better than merely reading it. Please, don’t hesitate from polishing off us “rough gems”.
Lance,
Good video on some day game essentials.
Get in touch if you ever visit London!
-G
I enjoyed this video as I do all your work. You give more away free, gems I might add, than what your competitors give away in their full courses. On behalf of men all over the world, “Thanks A Million!”
Yeah Lance you break it down very effectively,I live in Greece and greek women respond to everything you teach…
Just keep posting new videos with this stuff…
Thanks…
there’s no volume in the video…nothing wrong with my PC!
I loved the way you broke every step down into simple everyday language I can understand! I have a better concept of this now, and you showed it very well!!!
“Are u gonna flirt?!” sooooo cheesy…….
those videos r really good thanks a lot
Great video! Especially if you’re tired of bars/clubs and trying to focus more on day game.
The last video was mind-blowing. “Extracting” her from her own world and making her aware that you exist, are worthy of her attention and then potentially making her WANT to be worthy of yours seems to be a key point, at least to me. Lance, thank you!
I want more videos… please!